It was probably the strangest promotion ever. My mother has a great job as a corporate lawyer. She works for Tantus Technologies in their acquisitions department.
When they acquired a smaller company which made sex toys, the Board of Directors decided to continue the manufacturing of the adult products, because they were highly profitable.
However, none of the high powered attorneys wanted anything to do with the sex toys department because they were afraid it would stain their reputations (no pun intended).
So, my mother was offered the spot as lead attorney for the sex toys department. If things went well, she was promised an even bigger promotion as a corporate lawyer for Tantus Technologies.
Sure enough, my mother accepted the job. It was a decision which would change our lives forever.
My mother placed the box on the dining table after arriving home from work. It was a plain box. Unmarked. Obviously a prototype.
“Well, here it is,” she said, putting her hands on her hips.
She was still dressed in her corporate attire, which consisted of an office skirt and a buttoned up top.
“What is it?” I asked.
“The new SuperTsunami1000.”
She shook her head. “Never mind. The name’s not important.”
There was a slight look of embarrassment on her face after she had said the name of the device. After all, the thing was a sex toy.
“So you’re literally taking your work home with you,” I teased.
I couldn’t help teasing my mother. And she responded by putting her hands on her hips and giving me a stern motherly look.
“As a little reminder, don’t forget who’s paying for your expensive college tuition.”
“Okay, okay,” I backed off.
My mother also backed away from her stern look.
“I’m in charge of making sure we don’t get sued,” she said. “You know, products liabilities, deceptive marketing. That sort of thing.”
“Deceptive marketing? For a sex toy?”
She nodded. “This isn’t just any sex toy. The SuperTsunami series has grossed tens of millions around the world. This new model is expected to break records. Especially with all the claims that the inventors have made.”
“Good thing you’ve acquired them. Just in time.”
“True, but with those claims comes responsibilities. We could be looking at lawsuits if we don’t deliver.”
“So what are you going to do? Test it?” I asked.
She nearly blushed, “The corporate bosses suggested that I give it a try before doing any sort of legal analysis. I need to know how true the claims are.”
The question I asked was half-joking. But my mother was entirely serious about having to use the sex toy. It was a response I wasn’t expecting. Suddenly, I knew things were going to be awkward.
That night. I went to my room to sleep. Before I could close my bedroom door, I heard a loud buzzing sound which immediately stopped. There was no doubt about it. Mom must have been trying out the new sex toy. What a dirty thought to imagine.
My mother opened her bedroom door and we awkwardly looked at each other in the hallway. She wore a small t-shirt and pajama pants. There was a slightly embarrassed look on her face.
“Did you hear that?” she asked.
I nodded, “Yeah.”
“Sorry,” she nearly blushed. “I’m terrible with gadgets. Or in this case, power tools.”
This time, I was the one who nearly blushed when my mother referred to the sex toy as a ‘power tool.’ Whatever it was, it must have been impressive.
She looked frustrated She was a perfectionist and an extremely hard worker. That’s why she was able to graduate from a top law school and work for a major corporation.
That also explained why she was still awake late at night playing with her company’s new sex toy.
“Well, I’m sure reading the instruction manual would help,” I suggested.
“That’s part of the problem. There isn’t one yet. Nothing is going to be printed unless I give the approval for their claims.”
“No one showed you how to use it?”
“I had a crash course from one of the designers,” she replied. “But like I said, I’m terrible with gadgets.”
“You’ll figure it out.”
In classic mom fashion, she knew what I was thinking just by looking at the expression on my face.
“Do you want to help?” she asked, hands on her hips, like she was too proud to ask.
I shrugged, “Would that be weird?”
“It’s for work. Very important work, I might add. So if you promise to be professional, then I’d like your help. Is that okay?”
Things were starting to feel weird already.
“I’m always professional.”
She gave me a skeptical look and gestured for me to enter her bedroom.
The device was unlike anything I had ever seen before. It was shaped like a vibrator (the kind that looks like it’s molded after a large penis). There was also a handle at the end with all sorts of switches and settings. It looked highly advanced and I understood why so many women would pay big bucks for it.
After fidgeting with it for a while, I figured out how the thing worked. I explained to my mother the different settings available, along with all of the different vibrations it could make.
My mother looked at me like I was speaking a different language. Her expertise was legal writing and analysis, not mechanical things. And especially not sex toys. She wasn’t that type of person. She was the prim and proper type of a woman.
But, my mother seemed to manage when I handed it to her, and she played around with it for a while. It was so bizarre handing my mother an advanced sex toy and teaching her how to use it. I’m sure she felt the same way. But as always, her main priority was her job and getting it done.
“You’re the best,” she said, switching the vibrator off. “Now if you don’t mind, I would really like to… nevermind…”
She gave another embarrassed look. It was clear that she was planning to use the sex toy on herself. How awkward.
“I’ll leave you to it,” I casually replied, trying to make things less awkward.
I prepared to leave as fast as possible.
“Wait,” she said, with an apprehensive look on her face. “This job really means a lot to me. I could receive a big promotion if the launch of this device goes smoothly. So I want to do my very best. And in order to do that, I need a well-informed opinion of the SuperTsunami1000.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being dedicated.”
She sighed, “I don’t think you understand.”
Things were getting confusing.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, I need to experience this firsthand. But I’m terrified of it. I honestly don’t know how I could use it on myself. Just look at this thing.”
She held out the vibrator and waved it, showing me just how intimidating the device was. She had a great point. Not every woman can simply put a vibrating dildo inside of them (especially one that powerful).
In that moment, I kind of froze. Who knows what to do when your mother waves a sex toy in front of you?
“How can I help?” I asked sheepishly.
Her face suddenly went blank. “I don’t know. You’re a handsome young college guy. I’m sure you have plenty of experience with other young women.”
“You want advice?”
“I honestly don’t know,” she said.
Suddenly, it seemed like my highly intelligent mother was dumbfounded. Her world was legal analysis. Not sex.
“This is getting really weird.”
She nodded. “I know. Believe me, I know this is weird.”
“I’m open to anything you want.”
She looked dumbfounded again. Then her facial expressions totally changed. There was a sudden look of resolve on her face, like she was determined illegal bahis to meet her goal. It was the exact attitude which helped her to become a successful corporate lawyer.
“First, I want you to promise me something,” she said firmly. “Promise me that this will remain purely professional.”
It was clear she meant business (literally and figuratively).
“I promise. Anything to help.”
“Second, this is only for tonight. Okay?”
“Third, I need you to be respectful about this,” she said. “No jokes. No laughing. No games. We’ll behave like two adults discussing adult matters.”
“I got it.”
“Fourth, no one can ever know. Ever. This will always remain between us.”
My mother seemed as lawyerly as ever. I had seen her lawyer side before. But it was rare for her to be so professional in our home, late at night, and just between us. She definitely had good reason though.
She seemed content with my promises after giving me a long hard stare. She needed a reassurance that I would be respectful about this (whatever this is).
“Now that we’ve got that out of the way…” she said, hands on her hips while she thought for a moment. “How would you approach an issue like this? I mean, if you had a girlfriend who wanted to experiment with a SuperTsunami, how would you do it?”
This time, it was my turn to think for a moment. I had never been with a girl who used a vibrator on herself. So I wouldn’t know. But I had ideas.
“Given the size of that thing, I’d obviously need to arouse her first,” I said.
Her eyebrow rose. “I’m still listening.”
It was obvious that mom was genuinely interested in my ideas. This was important to her and she was fully dedicated to her job, no matter how awkward things might get.
“Well, as you obviously know, arousal is the best way to get a woman ready for penetration.”
“Probably the only way,” she added. “At least in my case.”
It was a surprising comment from my mother. But she didn’t seem the least bit fazed by it. She didn’t seem embarrassed either. Our verbal contract of being professional was something she took seriously.
“Yeah, so I would suggest, you know, arousal first. It’s that simple.”
She waved the device again. “Nothing is that simple. Especially not with this device.”
“You’re correct though. Arousal seems to be the key. But there are other problems though.”
“Like I nearly snapped my wrist when I tried using this thing,” she replied. “Not literally. But this VibMax can really vibrate. I’m afraid I might hurt myself.”
“That’s because you switched it to the most powerful setting. Try a low setting first,” I suggested.
She sighed, “I need to understand the full capabilities of this device before I can give my legal opinion to the company. In order to do that….you get the idea…”
I sure did. The idea of my well-educated mother using an advanced vibrator on a high setting was a surreal thought.
“So what are you suggesting?”
Her lips tightened for a moment. “Can you help me?”
I felt a strange sense of uncomfortableness and a weird sense of arousal. I’m sure my mother felt the same.
She nodded. “Only for tonight. Remember, it’s for my career. I could receive a big promotion in the next few years.”
“Okay…. so…. how should we start.”
There was a sudden blank look on my mother’s face.
“I don’t have the slightest idea. You’re the expert, remember?”
“I guess so.”
“Well then, Mr. Expert, how should we begin?” she asked in a slightly sarcastic and playful tone.
This time, I was the one with the blank look for a moment.
“I guess you should start by laying on the bed,” I finally said.
She put her hands on her hips. “You can’t be serious.”
There was a stern look on her face.
“Hey, don’t get mad at me,” I replied. “This was your idea. Unless I misunderstood something.”
There was a few seconds of awkward silence as she just stared at me with that unnecessary stern expression. Finally, she relented.
“Sorry for overreacting,” she said in a softer tone. “I’m not used to having you talk to me like this. It may be hard for you to understand.”
“Believe me, this isn’t easy for me either.”
“Then we understand each other.”
“What now?” I asked. “Looks like this is too weird for us to handle.”
“Not at all. We just need to be more mature about it.”
“I’m trying my best.”
“Turn around,” she said. “Only for a moment.”
“Are you sure you want to do this?”
She nodded. “I’ve always been persistent. It’s the key to my academic and career success. I never quit.”
“You’re a great role model, mom,” I joked.
She smiled, “Turn around.”
And so I did. I turned around and faced the wall. I heard the sound of clothes ruffling. I had an idea of what that sound was. But I couldn’t have been sure. It was a most unusual situation and my mother is an extremely proper woman.
Finally, the sound of clothes ruffling ended.
“You can face me again,” she said.
I turned back around to face my mother.
There she was, standing as casual as ever. She wore nothing but her small t-shirt. Her pants and panties were removed. Her legs were bare. Her pubic hairs were on proud display.
She was naked from the waist down.
I gulped. “Mom, you’re…”
“Bottomless? It’s part of the process, isn’t it?”
There was calmness in her demeanor. My mother was a true professional. Any other time, she would have been furious if I saw her bottomless. But for work, she seemed okay with it.
Seeing her pussy had put me in a trance. As someone who loves mature women, she looked awesome.
I stared for a moment.
“Well?” she asked, snapping me out of the trance. “See something you like?”
“We need to get started soon,” she reminded.
“Right. Um…lay on the bed.”
“Great idea. Hang on a moment.”
My mother put the vibrator on the bed, then turned and walked swiftly to her bathroom. That’s when I saw her naked ass, which looked full, round, and begging to be squeezed.
She came back with a towel, which she spread neatly across her bed. Then she laid on the bed, on top of her towel. Her legs were pressed tightly together. Her pubic hairs looked nice and neat. Her feet were pointed up in the air.
I stood in awe of what was happening.
“Are you having trouble concentrating?” she asked light-heartedly.
It was then that I fully understood how far my mother was willing to go with this. She was totally serious about everything.
“Are you sure you want me to do this?”
“I wouldn’t have removed my bottom if I wasn’t sure,” she replied, like it was so obvious.
“How far do you want me to go?” I asked nervously. “I mean, how much do you expect me to do?”
My mother spread her legs. Her light brown labia was visible. So was the inside of her pink pussy.
“How far do you think?” she asked, with her pussy exposed.
I gulped. “Okay.’
“Now let’s get this over with. I need to wake up early tomorrow.”
I approached my mother, who was laying on the bed with her legs open. The closer I came to her, the more I saw her pussy. It looked so ready and inviting. I was almost afraid that I might have an erection at any moment. (And from my own mother of all people)
She swiftly closed her legs.
“Anything wrong?” I asked.
“Remember, this is only for tonight, for work purposes only, and this is our secret. Understood?”
“Of course I understand.”
“Good,” she replied with a menacing undertone.
With that, she spread her legs wide open again. I saw her pussy up close when tipobet I got on the bed. It looked beautiful. Just the way a mature pussy should look.
There was a slight glistening which showed her arousal. I wondered what made her so aroused. Maybe it was the fact that she was about to have an advanced vibrator used on her. Or maybe it was the fact that her own son was doing this to her. Maybe both.
It was an incredibly taboo moment.
“Can I touch you?” I asked bluntly.
“If that’s part of the process, then do it.”
It was an unequivocal approval. Out of pure curiosity, I reached forward to touch my mother’s pussy. She kept looking up at the ceiling. Her face didn’t flinch as I rubbed her outer labia. Maybe she was just embarrassed about the whole thing. Or she didn’t want to show her pleasure for whatever reason.
When I touched her clitoris, her body slightly flinched. Her lips tightened. There was no doubt she was aroused. But she continued to fight it.
I rubbed her clitoris in a circular motion and I could see her body react. After a few more moments of rubbing, I could hear mom breathing harder. It was working.
All the while, as her legs were spread, I could see more glistening from her pink hole. She was getting wetter. She was enjoying it. She was aroused.
“Can we take this to the next step?” I asked.
“Yes,” she simply replied.
That’s when I pushed my index finger inside her pussy. She felt warm and wet. I couldn’t believe it. My finger was inside of her body. And by the look on her face, she couldn’t believe it either.
She closed her eyes and continued keeping her lips tight. For whatever reason, she didn’t want to show her arousal.
After a brief back and forth motion, I put two fingers inside of her. It had a greater effect and I heard mom breathing harder.
“There’s something I need to tell you,” she said.
My fingers were still inside of her.
“What is it?”
There was a look of hesitation on her face, as if her revelation was more embarrassing than actually showing her pussy to me, and having my two fingers inside her hole.
“I rarely orgasm,” she admitted. “It’s difficult for me.”
There was sincerity in her voice. I could tell this meant a lot to her. Suddenly, this was more than about her career. It was also about her sexuality and her identity as a woman.
My fingers went deeper inside of her warm wet hole. She closed her eyes again.
“Relax,” I said. “We’re going to make this happen. I promise.”
My fingers continue its work. It was absolutely surreal fingering my own mother. She enjoyed it. And so did I.
“Can you kiss it?” she asked softly, eyes still closed. “Kiss it while you rub it. That always puts me in the mood.”
I had an instant erection. It felt so wrong, but both of us were in the mood.
“Are you sure?”
After a moment of hesitation, I leaned forward and kissed her labia. It felt so soft and smooth. The wetness was on my lips. My hands were on her soft thighs and I felt my mother move a little. She was definitely enjoying it.
More kisses came and she gave a soft moan. It sounded like she was trying to suppress her feelings, as if she was struggling with her own internal feelings. It couldn’t have been easy for her, being kissed this way by her own son, and on her vagina.
I licked her clit and worked my fingers inside her pussy, which got the most reaction. This time, she moaned loudly and her hips squirmed.
“Are you ready to use the vibrator now?” I asked, with my fingers still inside her.
She shook her head. “That thing is huge. Is there anything bigger than your fingers, that you can use first?”
“Let me see.”
I looked around my mother’s bedroom and tried to think. She definitely didn’t have a sex toy around. She wasn’t the type. And if she did have one, she probably would have suggested it already.
“Do you think you can use yourself?” she asked bluntly, with only a subtle hint of shame in her voice. “I mean, do you mind?”
“What do you mean?”
She gestured to my midsection. “That. I can tell you’re aroused. I won’t mind. Not tonight, anyway.”
Holy shit! There was no doubt about it. My mother wanted me to penetrate her with my cock. With my erection, rather.
“Do you really…”
“I’ve given you my consent,” she said, with the arousal clearly in her voice. “This is important work, okay?”
I nodded, “Okay mom.”
I pulled my fingers away and sat upright on the bed, between her legs. It was so weird. The most awkward moment in both of our lives. I looked down at my mother. She looked so beautiful. Her legs were open and her pussy was drenched. There was a conflicted look on her face. She was so aroused. Yet she was still struggling with the idea that her own son would be doing this to her.
When I pulled my shorts down, there was no objection. Mom continued looking up at the ceiling.
When I positioned myself above her, there was still no objection. But this time, she looked me right in the eyes.
“Slow and gentle,” she said. “Then I’ll be ready for the vibrator after.”
She followed that statement with a playful wink. It was time. And we were both ready.
I reached below and guided my erection to her pussy. My erection pressed against her vaginal lips and pink hole. Then I pushed. I entered.
She took a deep breath when my cock went inside. Our eyes were locked. There was an expression on her face which read, ‘Oh my god. This is actually happening.’ And it was. I pushed and went deeper. Her pussy was tight and warm. And it felt wetter by the moment.
I pushed until I was all the way inside. Then I held it there, giving her time to adjust to having something inside of her.
“You know,” she said, hands on my arms. “That’s the same hole you came from. Now you’re buried in there.”
There was a playfulness in her voice. She didn’t struggle with this anymore. She was clearly enjoying herself.
“Do you like it?”
“Go slow,” she replied. “I love it.”
I did what she asked and went slow. Never had we been so intimate. My cock slowly pulled out and went back in. Each movement, mom’s body reacted. Our eyes remained locked. Slowly, we began having sex.
It took a few moments before we fully got a rhythm going. I couldn’t believe that I was actually fucking my own mother. And for her career of all reasons. I was in complete awe of looking at the subtle expressions on her face as she received pleasure. And I was amazed by how naughty her pussy felt.
Minutes passed. I couldn’t believe that she was allowing me to fuck her. Her eyes opened and closed. Her body shook as we fucked harder. Then finally, it came to an end when she tapped me on the chest.
“I think I’m ready for it,” she panted. “Quick, quick.”
I knew exactly what she meant. It was time to get to work.
When my cock was pulled out of her pussy, her body shivered a little. I was sad that I didn’t get to fuck her anymore and my cock was still rock hard. But we were doing this for work. Her legal career was the first priority. And that meant giving her an orgasm with the powerful sex toy.
I picked up the SuperTsunami1000, wondering how to proceed.
“I’ll put it inside first,” I said. “Then I’ll put it on a low setting.”
She nodded. “Okay.”
Entry was easy since her pussy was already dripping wet and used. The sex toy slid right in while my mother held her labia open with her fingers. Her body twitched when I pushed it further. I slowly pushed until it went all the way inside of her hole.
There it was. The advanced tipobet güvenilir mi vibrator was buried deep in her cunt.
“Ready?” I asked.
She paused. “Ready.”
That’s when I turned the device on, using a low setting. The motors of the sex toy began operating and it made a low vibrational sound.
My mother gasped and groaned softly. She tried suppressing the noises from her mouth. Maybe she was just embarrassed to moan loudly. Whatever the case, she was clearly enjoying it.
I tried to make things more pleasurable by slowly pulling the vibrating sex toy back, then gently pushing it back in- fucking her with it.
“God,” she moaned, closing her eyes. “It hurts. But it feels good. I’ve never had a vibrator in me before.”
“Should we leave it at this level?”
“No. I need to feel it.”
“Ready to go higher then?”
She hesitated. “Do it.”
When I switched the vibrator to the next level, my mother groaned out loud. Her entire body tightened and her face grimaced. The sex toy vibrated harder and louder.
As I looked down at my mother, I saw her legs clenching tightly and her toes curling. It was such an erotic sight. Better than anything you could ever see in a porn. This was real. And with a highly educated woman as the recipient of the pleasure.
I adjusted the vibrator, to keep it from falling out. Then I did the same push/pull routine, fucking her with it again. It made her groan.
“Leave it in place,” she said. “It doesn’t need to be moved.”
I held the vibrator in place, watching her facial and body expressions struggle to cope with the vibrations of the sex toy.
“How many levels are there?” she asked.
“What level is it on now?”
“Just the second level.”
“God…” she groaned.
“Ready to go higher?”
I was shocked. “That’s two steps higher.”
“Just fucking do it.”
That was the first time I had ever heard my mother curse. Ever. But to be fair, it was an entirely justified circumstance. There was a vibrating super sex toy in her pussy and she needed to orgasm.
So I complied with her wish. I switched the SuperTsunami1000 to level four and the thing went wild.
It buzzed loudly as the small (but powerful) motors kicked into high gear. The vibrations became really intense and I had to use more strength to hold it inside of her.
And then there was the reaction from my mother. She went wild. Simple as that. Her eyes shot open and her mouth formed an O shape. Her body jerked and she struggled to maintain her composure.
“Oh my god!” she screamed.
Her legs shook and her toes curled tightly.
“Should I lower it?!” I asked worriedly.
“Don’t you fucking dare!”
My well-educated mother had turned into a sex crazed woman because of the sex toy. The prim and proper facade was stripped away. Gone was the respectable lawyer. Gone was the domesticated mother. Gone was the highly regarded member of the community.
The only thing left was a woman pushed to the very brink of her sexuality. All thanks to an advanced prototype vibrator. And it was being used by her very own son of all people!
The madness continued for a few moments as the vibrator worked near full blast. My mother struggled to cope with the super high intensity of the vibrations. But she managed. Her body shook and shivered. I even saw her nipples poking through her t-shirt.
Fluids leaked from her pussy. It was a good thing that my mother had placed a bath towel on the bed where she laid. It absorbed all of the fluids which were seeping from her pussy.
“Fuck, I’m going to cum!!!” she cried.
“Relax, mom. Relax.”
Now, I was really starting to get concerned. The vibrator was already stronger than anything I had ever seen in a porn. It vibrated powerfully and took complete control of her body (and mind). Now she wanted the next step, which was the highest level.
“Are you sure?”
“Do it,” she groaned, this time struggling to speak. “I need to feel it.”
“Okay. Tell me when you want me to stop.”
That’s when I switched the SuperTsunami1000 to level five.
It suddenly vibrated like crazy and my mother screamed at the top of her lungs. I was terrified at my mother’s reaction. And I was equally as terrified that the neighbors might call the police, only for them to find a mother and son engaged in lewd sexual activities.
Her body shook uncontrollably and suddenly her body tensed. Her lower back arched and her eyes were wide open.
Trickles of sweat had formed on her forehead and around her nose. There was even sweat coming from her neck and chest.
“Pull it out!!!” she yelled.
I immediately turned the vibrator off and pulled it out of her pink dripping wet pussy.
What followed was a massive gush of vaginal fluids. It squirted powerfully from the inside of her little hole. Who knew? My mother was a squirter. Or maybe it was purely from the effect of the powerful sex toy.
Every muscle in her body tightened and contracted as her pussy shot the long stream of squirt. Every line on her face showed as well, as her face grimaced tightly from the intensity she felt inside. The reaction her body had was powerful and unlike anything I had ever seen before.
She squirted all over my lower body, her bed, and even onto the carpet.
When it was done, my mother laid lifeless on the bed. Eyes closed. Arms and legs spread apart. Her pussy was reduced to a well-used gaping hole, glistening from the wetness of her orgasm.
Finally, she moved.
“Unbelievable,” she groaned.
Her eyes were open and she stared at the ceiling.
“This thing really works.”
“I’ve figured that out already,” she quipped.
She was quiet for a moment. “Give me a second.”
For a moment, she closed her eyes and enjoyed the benefits of her orgasmic eruption. She had just experienced an orgasm that most people would never understand.
She didn’t seem to care that her pussy was still exposed. At that point, why would she? I had already fucked her and made her orgasm with the sex toy.
Then she moved.
She climbed out of bed, then she grabbed me by the wrist. She didn’t say anything. But she dragged me to the bathroom with her.
“What are we doing?”
“I owe you a shower,” she replied. “I’ve made a huge mess. This is the least I can do.”
When we were inside of her bathroom, she pulled her t-shirt off, and I saw her small breasts, which were slightly sagging, yet firm. They were perfect breasts for a mature woman. Her brown nipples were still hard and I wished that I could suck them, but I was too afraid to ask.
“Wow,” I managed to say.
She pulled my t-shirt off and we were both naked.
“I’m glad you like my body,” she smiled. “But before we shower, I think I owe you an orgasm. It’s the least I can do. Don’t you agree?”
“Of course, mom.”
With that, she dropped down to her knees and engulfed my cock. Who knew? My lawyer mother was actually an expert at giving oral sex. She used her hands, lips, and tongue to full effect. I’m sure it had something to do with that explosive orgasm she felt. She was sucking my cock out of pure lust.
Her hands stroked me furiously while her mouth expertly sucked.
It wasn’t long before I came. And my mother swallowed every single drop that I shot in her mouth.
She winked at me while she licked her lips clean. Then she said, “Your cum tastes good. It’s been a while since I sucked a cock. I miss it!” Then it was time for the shower. She grabbed me by the wrist again and took me inside where she began by washing away the orgasmic fluids between her legs.
As we dried, she thanked me for my “professional” help. I said, “are there any other toys at Tantus that need “legal” proofing?” She patted me on my ass and said, “I’ll give you a catalog, and you can tell me.”