Adventures with Lady Audrey.Adventures with Lady Audrey.Having inherited a second-hand book shop from my wife’s father, we decided we would give it a go and see if it made money. My wife Pat carried on with her social work career while I, being self employed, manned the book shop. It barely covered its expenses but with big ideas and enthusiasm we persevered. One aspect I enjoyed was chatting with and getting to know interesting people. One in particular was a dapper elderly lady called Audrey who had inherited a title from her late husband. She had spent her life teaching the wealthy and their c***dren to ride and jump, and written books on the subject. She was intellectual and quick witted but very down to earth without airs or graces and we enjoyed our little chats in the shop. When a couple of weeks passed without a visit from Audrey I marched round to her house one Friday lunch time to see if she was alright. She was and was pleased to see me and appreciated that someone cared. She put the kettle on and we had a coffee and a biscuit. It transpired that her nice had been visiting with her c***dren and one of the little charmers had given Audrey a bug. She was, however, recovered and after an entertaining chat it was time for me to get back to the shop. We decided to make Friday a regular luncheon date and for many weeks we entertained each other with some of the highs and lows of our personal lives; and being seventy nine, she had many. One of Audrey’s anecdotes was the time she was a pupil at a Catholic girls boarding school in Cumbria. The school received a handsome new chaplain and all the girls thought he was dreamy, and more than one was known to visit him for carnal delights after lights out. I jokingly asked Audrey if she visited him and she said she would like to have but wouldn’t have dared, and anyway, she wasn’t pretty enough. She told me she was brought up in a strict household with a nanny and she was a virgin till the wedding night of her arranged marriage, and that that was a disaster, her husband having more interest in young men than in her; apparently they had separate bedrooms and kept them locked, and she was, in essence, still a virgin. I told her about my first girlfriend, and omitting that my first sexual experience was with an older man, admitted that I was a late starter and twenty four before losing my virginity to a woman. She joked that I had probably made up for it since, and I did not contradict her.She asked me about wet dreams, her nice had mentioned that her eldest son had started having them and it was causing her a lot of extra washing because niğde escort he messed in his bed every night.I explained that pubescent boys and some young men were prone to wet dreams but we generally grow out of it. She thought it most inconvenient and made me laugh with the comment that no sooner do boys learn not to piss the bed than they start having wet dreams in it. I pointed out that it would only be a few drops; and she laughed, saying she thought we squirted pints of the stuff like horses.She asked me if I had ever had a wet dream and what did we dream about while having them. I said I didn’t remember having one myself and could only imagine the dreams were about a sexy teacher or the girl next door. She asked me how much men produce when they ejaculate. I said probably no more than an eggcup full and she was surprised and said a good stud produced floods of the stuff, and laughing, told me that once she was introducing a pestle to a mare and it went off in her hand like a hose.I mentioned that I didn’t think I had ever seen a horses doodahs and she explained that stallions were unruly and difficult to handle so they had them chopped off. She asked how far a man ejaculated his semen. I said it depended on the man, some, two or three inches, others two or three feet. She asked where I came on that spectrum and I laughed, saying that I had never measured it. Out of the blue she suggested we find out, she had a tape measure in her sewing basket and promptly went and got it.She said she didn’t want to get any of “it” on the suite or the carpet, and suggesting we do it on the patio, unlatched and slid open the door. We? I asked, thinking she couldn’t be serious. Yes, she nonchalantly replied, pointing out that she had guided many a horses pestle into a mare. I laughed; but the mildly eccentric woman was serious, and sitting on one of the patio chairs, asked me if I was going to get it out and “do my stuff”. The situation was making me feel somewhat horny. I had often observed she was in remarkable condition for her age; but did she really intend to measure how far I could ejaculate?I unzipped my trousers and her reaction was one of interest. I took out my six and a half inch erect cock and she asked me if that was it. Wondering what she had expected, I said I was afraid it was.She took hold of it with her bony fingers and commented that it was surprisingly hard. She asked if it felt nice with her holding it. I said it felt lovely but would feel even better if she drew my foreskin back and forth. She did and as the glans emerged remarked that she could almost see her reflection escort niğde in it. She told me to let her know when I was about to ejaculate, but after a couple of minutes she changed hands and wondered how much longer it was going to take.She had obviously never handled a human cock before, but all the handling was really winding me up and the point came when I couldn’t help putting my hand on top of hers and within a few seconds releasing a mother-load in half a dozen majestic spurts.Audrey was fascinated and asked me what it felt like. I told her there was nothing like it, and with my hand still on top of hers, squeezed the last drops out of my cock. As my cock softened I let go of her hand and she felt my balls and said she was surprised how much came out of the little things, and measuring the farthest splash, reported a magnificent thirty eight inches.She asked how I felt after my performance. I said I felt very relaxed and a little bit naughty, but it was lovely and I wished I could do the same for her. She said her days for that sort of thing had passed. I said that was nonsense and I wished I could return the favour. After a moments pause she asked how one would go about it. I told her that if she removed her underwear we could work something out, that she might enjoy it, at least it would be an experience; it was a shame not to try. She quoted “what one has never had one never misses”. I said that was a shame and that intimacy between friends was a lovely thing. She said her old nanny would turn in her grave. I said that she might be jealous.After another moments thought Audrey told me to give her five minutes and then come to her bedroom. I pinched myself, wondering if she really was going to let me have sex with her and what her naked body would look like.The five minutes passed, and taking a deep breath I knocked on her bedroom door. She gave me permission to enter. I did and found the game old girl laid on a neatly made double bed looking at the ceiling with her legs together. She was wearing a blue cardigan with a long white knee length silk shift beneath, and red slippers. The flimsy materiel of the shift revealed the contours of her hip bones and a prominent hairy pubis, and sitting beside her I asked if we were OK. She said she was but told me to take it easy. Without the usual woolly tights her legs looked pale and thin, but legs were legs and I was more concerned with what I was going to find at the top of them.I gently eased them apart and slid my hand under her shift until I felt her pubic hair. For a lean woman her outer labia were fairly plump, and niğde escort bayan pushing my finger between them I unearthed a small but sensitive clitoris, and as I rolled it round and round with my finger, she closed her eyes and her breathing changed and the tension melted away.I slid my finger to the opening of her vagina and while there were no floods, she was wet and I eased the finger in and stroked the sensitive wall of her vagina, and with each stroke she suffered an involuntary contraction in her belly. After some minutes she became restless and grasped at the bedclothes, and wanting to join in the fun, I withdrew my finger, quickly stripped off and knelt between her legs. She briefly peeked, and seeing me naked muttered, “oh my god”.I lifted her shift and exposed a sparse greying bush and to my relief a reasonably neat inner labia, and settling between her legs, sucked her clitoris into my mouth and gave it a boxing lesson with my tongue. It was difficult to tell whether she was in ecstasy or agony; I suspected both and considered transferring my tongue to her vagina. But my cock was in need of attention and drawing my foreskin back for action, I propped myself above her and introduced him to the entrance of her vagina. It was not the biggest opening in the world but I carefully worked my cock-end in and began very gently inching it deeper.Audrey grabbed my arms as if I was shoving a red hot poker inside her and I asked if she was OK. She nodded, and I began slowly pushing myself in and out, a little deeper with each gentle thrust until my pubic hair was tickling her pearly little clitoris. She was as tight as a boy scouts bum and my cock was happy to be there. I suggested she unbutton her cardigan, she did and I pushed it aside and her small nipples were showing sharp and erect through her shift. I kissed them through the silk and held them between my teeth. But the gentle see-sawing of my hips had built up to a crescendo and I suddenly found myself ejaculating inside my friend and gasping in her ear that I had arrived.The decoupling was a slow and awkward affair with me asking Audrey if she was alright and she asking me the same question. She said it had been a strange experience, like being invaded and abused but at the same time wanting it. She asked what it was like for me and I said it had been wonderful, there was nothing like it, and I thanked her and tentatively suggested that if she ever wanted to do it again I would love to oblige. She said we would see, and wondering if I ought to be getting dressed, told me I could use her en-suite. Washed and dressed, I emerged to find her sat on the edge of the bed in a dressing gown. I said I had best go and we parted with the usual peck on each others cheeks.I was disappointed she hadn’t experienced a momentous orgasm, but hopefully the next time.